diff --git a/spec/more_speech/nostr/protocol_spec.clj b/spec/more_speech/nostr/protocol_spec.clj
index 35a4a97..7410e93 100644
--- a/spec/more_speech/nostr/protocol_spec.clj
+++ b/spec/more_speech/nostr/protocol_spec.clj
@@ -1,5 +1,24 @@
 (ns more-speech.nostr.protocol-spec
   (:require [speclj.core :refer :all]
-            [more-speech.nostr.protocol :refer :all]))
+            [more-speech.nostr.protocol :refer :all]
+            [more-speech.nostr.util :as util]))
 
-(describe "nothing")
\ No newline at end of file
+(declare now)
+(describe "protocol utilities"
+  (with-stubs)
+  (with now 100)
+  (it "increments relay retries on un-retried relays"
+    (with-redefs [util/get-now (stub :get-now {:return @now})]
+      (should= {"relay" {:retries 1, :retry-time @now}}
+               (increment-relay-retry {"relay" {}} "relay"))))
+
+  (it "increments relay retries on retried relays"
+      (with-redefs [util/get-now (stub :get-now {:return @now})]
+        (should= {"relay" {:retries 3, :retry-time @now}}
+                 (increment-relay-retry {"relay" {:retries 2 :retry-time (dec @now)}} "relay"))))
+
+  (it "resets relay retries on relays that haven't been retried in over an hour"
+      (with-redefs [util/get-now (stub :get-now {:return @now})]
+        (should= {"relay" {:retries 1, :retry-time @now}}
+                 (increment-relay-retry {"relay" {:retries 10 :retry-time (- @now 3600001)}} "relay"))))
+  )
\ No newline at end of file
diff --git a/spec/more_speech/websocket_relay_spec.clj b/spec/more_speech/websocket_relay_spec.clj
index ca69825..cf7f046 100644
--- a/spec/more_speech/websocket_relay_spec.clj
+++ b/spec/more_speech/websocket_relay_spec.clj
@@ -9,10 +9,9 @@
   (it "can be made"
     (should= {::relay/type ::ws-relay/websocket
               ::ws-relay/url "url"
-              ::ws-relay/recv-f :some-f
-              ::ws-relay/socket nil
-              ::ws-relay/open? false}
-             (ws-relay/make "url" :some-f)))
+              ::ws-relay/callbacks :some-callbacks
+              ::ws-relay/socket nil}
+             (ws-relay/make "url" :some-callbacks)))
 
   (it "can open and close"
     (pending "be nice to relay.damus.io")
diff --git a/src/more_speech/nostr/protocol.clj b/src/more_speech/nostr/protocol.clj
index 23169ab..42d1e6e 100644
--- a/src/more_speech/nostr/protocol.clj
+++ b/src/more_speech/nostr/protocol.clj
@@ -96,17 +96,28 @@
     (when (some? open-relay)
       (swap! relays assoc-in [url :connection] open-relay))))
 
+(defn increment-relay-retry
+  "used in a swap!, increments retries counter unless the last retry was over an hour ago
+  and then resets to 1"
+  [relays url]
+  (let [relay (get relays url)
+        retries (get relay :retries 0)
+        last-retry-time (get relay :retry-time 0)
+        now (util/get-now)
+        time-since-last-retry (- now last-retry-time)
+        retries (if (> time-since-last-retry 3600000) 1 (inc retries))
+        relays (assoc-in relays [url :retries] retries)
+        relays (assoc-in relays [url :retry-time] now)]
+    relays))
+
 (defn handle-close [relay]
   (let [url (::ws-relay/url relay)
         now (quot (System/currentTimeMillis) 1000)
         minutes-10 600
-        date (- now minutes-10)
-        inc-retry (fn [relays url]
-                    (let [retries (get-in relays [url :retries] 0)]
-                      (assoc-in relays [url :retries] (inc retries))))]
+        date (- now minutes-10)]
     (prn 'relay-closed url)
     (swap! relays assoc-in [url :connection] nil)
-    (swap! relays inc-retry url)
+    (swap! relays increment-relay-retry url)
     (future
       (let [retries (get-in @relays [url :retries])
             seconds-to-wait (min 300 (* retries 10))]
diff --git a/src/more_speech/nostr/util.clj b/src/more_speech/nostr/util.clj
index fb3a1ac..1dfb4c3 100644
--- a/src/more_speech/nostr/util.clj
+++ b/src/more_speech/nostr/util.clj
@@ -81,3 +81,6 @@
         key-bytes (byte-array 32)
         _ (.nextBytes gen key-bytes)]
     key-bytes))
+
+(defn get-now []
+  (System/currentTimeMillis))